weird and wonderful quotes

[cideristhefuture]

enjoy every day

'long time dead'

[Stonehead]

"Mum, is that a fat bastard?"

Small child pointing to very large man in the supermarket.

[Dr.Syn]

I don't know who originally said this, but a friend gave me this one:

I am not put on this Earth to satisfy your expectations and you were not put here to satisfy mine. You are you and I am me.

Zoe

The full quote is from Perls Gestalt Prayer 1969
"I do my thing and you do your thing
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations
And you are not in this world to live up to mine
you are you and I am I
and if by chance we find each other it's beautiful
if not it can't be helped."

[Davie Crockett]

seen in a cubicle of a public toilet:

[Thomzo]

I don't know who originally said this, but a friend gave me this one:

I am not put on this Earth to satisfy your expectations and you were not put here to satisfy mine. You are you and I am me.

Zoe

The full quote is from Perls Gestalt Prayer 1969
"I do my thing and you do your thing
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations
And you are not in this world to live up to mine
you are you and I am I
and if by chance we find each other it's beautiful
if not it can't be helped."

Thanks - I always wondered where that came from.

Zoe

[Dr.Syn]

You're welcome, one from my collection of quotes from notice boards that I have found in staff rooms I'll pop some more on now and again

[Dr.Syn]

Weight Watcher

"I'll take one choc", said I to me -
And somehow I devoured three.

Said Me to I, "Just take one more".
Oh what a pig; I've eaten four.

The empty spaces count to six!
Perhaps my eyes are playing tricks.

I've scoffed a half. I'm full of sorrow
I'll close the box until tomorrow.

[Dr.Syn]

This is my favorite from a staff room

If you find your mug is clean
It's not the fairies that have been
Neither is it the little elves,
Nor do the blighters wash themselves.

In the early morn, it turns us up
To see so many mucky cups,
So to the kitchen then we take 'em
And get them clean as we can make 'em

But we're fed up with doing this chore
when the rest of you swan out the door
It would be nice if one fine day
We found some clean cups on the tray

So when you've had your favorite drink
There is a place (its called a sink)
Go there with your dirty cup
And be like us and wash it up.

[happyhippy]

Don't advize someone to do something that you would'nt be prepared to do yourself!

[happyhippy]

"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact... just surrounded by assholes" ~ William Gibson

Love it! Hmm Think I might print that one off and pin it up at work!lol lol

[baldybloke]

Only dead fish go with the flow.

A thrill a day keps the chill away - Mae West.

Measure yourself by your own standards, not someone elses.

So long and thanks for all the fish.

[Puddleduck]

Many a miss would not be a missus if liquor did not add a spark to her kisses - sign outside Rosie Malones pub, sadly no longer there....
I reject your reality and substitute my own - Mythbusters

It's a good life if you don't weaken - my grandad!!!

[wildbee]

'Thames-Water taken up about Greenwich at Low Water, where it is free from all Brackishness of the Sea, and has in it all the Fall and Sullage from this great City of London, makes very Strong Drink. It will of it self alone, being carryd to Sea, ferment wonderfully, and after its due Purgations,11 and three times stinking (after which it continues sweet) it will be so strong, that Several Sea Commanders have told me it wou'd burn, and has often fuddled their Marriners.' Edward Whitaker's Directions For Brewing (1700)

This bizarre quote was left for me when my cider didn't turn out so good... !

[Dr.Syn]

When the game is over the King and the Pawn go in the same box.