Mrs F I sympathise completely......you have had such a hard time but like Green Aura says, it is a time to celebrate......you are still here and a wonderful mum to Sophie. If that isnt cause for a celebration I dont know what is.
January is not a good month for me, I go theough dates........ this is the date I got the call from the hospital and dashed from one end of the country to the other to see my mum..... this is the date they took me to one side and said I needed to make a decision, to turn the machines off..... this is the day I lost my mum forever...... this is the date of the funeral,....this is the date of Mums birthday....
It doesnt matter how many years pass, I still feel the same each year.....it is my mums birthday tommorrow.
What I do each year now is start the new year on Feb 1st, that gives me time to feel sad, to still grieve and then try and get back to being positive.
Big hugs to you Mrs F and everyone else who has lost people close to their hearts. People say time is a great healer, I beg to differ! I just think we start to deal with it slightly differently.
