Moms!

[Alice Abbott]

Mine is driving me crazy. She is here for a 3 week visit and in the two days since she has arrived she has created absolute mayhem. Thank goodness she has now taken herself off "to the Mall" for the afternoon.

The main problem is that she will insist upon this "compare and contrast" thing with the twins. As far as I can see they are two perfectly normal toddlers. They may be twins and amazingly identical but they are very different. But she is convinced Vivi (the noisier, skinnier and bolshier of the two) is the next Einstein while poor placid Ginny (who smiles for everyone and tends towards plumpness and laziness) is verging on retardation. I know she is wrong but I fear she may just be going home to the US in a body bag is she keeps this up!

I'm afraid this chat forum is likely to be the outlet for my frustrations for the next few weeks. And I haven't even started on her opinions on our new decor (or total lack of it as far as she is concerned), the tendency of our electricity supply to trip if overloaded (a very French thing I understand - we just don't have enough appliances to trip it out normally but she has a trillion things on at once), the lack of coffee shops and fast food joints in the Charente Maritime (I know - funny/amusing under normal circumstances but not at them moment), the state of Pia's hair (she can't get to grips with the fact that the little angel gave herself a full and very wonky Mohican last August when I wasn't looking and actually ended up almost bald once I had tried to trim it into something vaguely sensible), my weight loss (she apparently can't comprehend running around after 4 kids, our menagerie and also growing and preparing all our food, not to mention being Mack's ongoing building site minion). How she managed FIVE of us when I was little, living in commune type places is a question I ask myself - I suspect we five survived at least partially in spite of her rather than because of her!

I love her to bits BUT preferably when she is on the west coast of the US and I'm on the west coast of anywhere else but there...

[demi]

i feel for you.
we ( my husband, 4 year old daughter and me ) have been living with my parents for the last 16 months because we came back to the uk to have another baby ( hospitals in macedonia are horriffic!) . the baby is 5 months old now and we have flights booked to go back home on the 7th of febuary and we are counting the days til then!
its got to the point now where my husband and my mum barely say 2 words to each other and are tip toeing round each other forcing out smiles while gritting their teeth trying not to engage in conversations for fear of futher arguments.
my parents are currently on holiday in a cottage way up north in scotland on the side of a mountain somwhere in december in the snow just to get away and give us all some much needed space from each other!
i have, on many accoation, been looking online for places to rent because i just cant stand us all living together anymore. but no matter how many times i calculate and recalculate our budget we just wouldnt be able to afford it on our own so we are stuck here for another 8 weeks!
im sure we will all, my parents included, be clelbrating when we finally leave!!!!!!

[demi]

haha! yes iv already gone down this road!
but apart from it being expencive, my parents have acctually insisted we stay for christmas.
it will probably be the last christmas with the whole family together, with us leaving and my grandparents close to kicking the bucket.
so we just have to smile and get on with it! :)

[Millymollymandy]

Hi Alice - lovely to hear from you again!

When your mother is getting you down, just remember the Christmas when you had your mother AND two sisters all at the same time........ I hope that will make you feel a bit better!

Now how's that book coming along?

[Thomzo]

Just revert to being a teenogre. Every time she says something that winds you up, just shrug your shoulders and mutter a grumpy "whatever".

Or, if she criticises your decor again, just smile sweetly and say "it's such a shame you'll never see this place finished".

Good luck, and if it does come to matricide, I'll be a character witness (if you'll do the same for me after Christmas).

Zoe

[Jessiebean]

Ha I like Zoes suggestions! Also I am sorry Alice, but I love to hear about your Mom, it reminds me of why I don't talk to my own any longer!

[happyhippy]

I moved away from my Mum(not to intentionally get away from her,other reasons)13 years ago,I live in the UK and my Mum lives in Australia,I just returned from there to share her 80th birthday with her.I know these posts are tongue in cheek but on more serious side,I so wish i could spend more time with my Mum.She has a myriad of health issues and probably won't be around much longer.Once their gone,thats it!Time spent with family is so precious,and you can't get it back.On the twin note,I'm a twin myself,and yes its very important people acknowledge the differences.
Demi:it might help to realise your parents have done you a huge favour in allowing you to stay(I'm presuming so you can save the money)so apart from the "atmosphere"I think your parents should be given a pat on the back.All my kids have left home(I have 3)and as much as I love to see them,now they have left home,when they do come and stay,yes I do really enjoy it but.....its so nice to have my peaceful quiet house back,no mountain of dishes to wash,the spare room looks lovely and tidy,I can sit down and relax at night without feeling the need to "entertain"lol Neighbours of ours have one son who is 20yrs of age.he left home last year to live with his girlfriend.To start with they really missed him,but over time they got used to being by themselves,and actually started to really embrace it.We used to have a giggle with them over this,and then unfortunately the relationship ended and their son moved back home.They were actually really disappointed!!!!!So it can work both ways folks!

[MKG]

I am utterly convinced that there is a school somewhere which runs courses for mothers who want to be professional pains in the arse. Mine passed with distinction.

But you're right, of course, happyhippy. She put up with me when I was a right royal know-it-all (nothing changes much, does it? ) so I suppose it's my turn now.

Maybe this Christmas she'll be different

Mike