advice for newly married men (this works)

[ADG]

when asked to hoover, do so as if the room is circular

when asked to wash up never get the plates properly clean

when asked to make the bed always pull the quilt over the pillows(women hate that they like the pillows on top)

when asked to put the dishes away make sure something will fall when they open the cupboard.

when asked to cook make sure you leave an unholy mess

the result...................
she never ask you to do it again

btw some one asked Kim if I was a considerate lover so I jumped in and said of course I am I lift my feet up when shes hoovering

all of the above are just a few of my own observations gents but if you have any of yr own please add

[Green Aura]

I must come round and offer some advice to your wife.

If my OH does any of the above he gets to practice til he gets it right

[Milims]

Do you plan on staying married for long??

[ADG]

been married 8yrs

[Milims]

been married 8yrs

Not long then!

[ADG]

I will do the house work then ladies if she will climb up those church steeples for me or over them roofs etc
she does moan that I dont go to work everyday but thats just my trade , she moans that I earn more in a day than she does all week
but she doesnt have bits missing from work like I do and in all honesty I do most of the cooking I do the animals and I occupy little one so I'm not really that bad an ?
I was only having a giggle

[Milims]

Don't panic - we know you were only gigglin' But we gal's have you blokeys sussed!

[ADG]

phew was panicking them due to the well known fact most us men believe women have had their sense of humour surgically removed

[healer]

Us girls could do the same...
when asked to sort out their tax - don't
when asked to collect those important widgets - don't
when asked to get their favorate sandwich filler - forget
forget to wash their favorate shirt....
....forget to stay awake without a headache

I think it was Tony Benn but I know others have said that the woman look after the details and bring beauty into their life.....ie make life worth living.

So get back up on your roof ADG before we have time to wonder why we have men around!

[ADG]

ummm I have just been informed that she has increased the value of the life insurance, now I am worried

[red]

phew was panicking them due to the well known fact most us men believe women have had their sense of humour surgically removed

stirrer!

I was ill with flu a few weeks ago, and stopped doing all that I normally do.. That was an eye opener for himself and our son.. it seems not only i had the flu but al the chore fairies had it too..

the general untidyness of the place was just teh same though... we can't do everything there is to be done.. housework always gets abandoned first

[Milims]

ummm I have just been informed that she has increased the value of the life insurance, now I am worried

Check for frays in your rope

[mrsflibble]

when asked to hoover, do so as if the room is circular

Yep, we've been living together 5 years now and jim STILL does that... but it's not stopped me MAKING him do it lol!

when asked to wash up never get the plates properly clean

nope, I'm the one with a problem there. I always foget to do the outside of plates, outside of pans and to rinse glasses so HE complains to ME lol!

when asked to make the bed always pull the quilt over the pillows(women hate that they like the pillows on top)

nope, sorry. wrong again. I like the pillows under the duvet because I'm so lazy the last thing I want to be doing is to have to move the pillows before I can get into bed....

when asked to put the dishes away make sure something will fall when they open the cupboard.

again, it's me that does that.... but it's not a problem because we only own plastic plates and "glasses" now and don't own enough mugs for me to have to stack the things.

when asked to cook make sure you leave an unholy mess

to that may I add to your post... when asked to cook leave an unholy mess OR take 3 hours to make a 20 min supper OR serve beans on toast for the 3 days your wife spent off her feet the last time she dislocated her hip before she got so sick of beans on toast she downed a high dose of painkillers and hobbled to the cooker just to get a change from bloody beans again..................

the result...................
she never ask you to do it again

sorry honey pie, in this house you do it and do it until you get it right. we have set jobs for each of us to do; mainly because the other hates doing them lol!

phew was panicking them due to the well known fact most us men believe women have had their sense of humour surgically removed

didn't you know? it leaves the body with the placenta after we have our first child............along with the ability to remember anything on a day to day basis.

[happy place]

guys all you need to know for a happy marriage (and i know this really works cause my dad told me ) is



YES DEAR



(it also annoys the pants out of my beloved)

[Derry]

guys all you need to know for a happy marriage (and i know this really works cause my dad told me ) is



YES DEAR



(it also annoys the pants out of my beloved)

this would be my daddys fave saying haha. ive started saying it to my bloke...