Selfsufficientish.com

circlecross wrote:Oh well, I'm sure that in a years time his school report will be saying "bully".

I think you will find they are not allowed to say that about the kids. I have been told they can't 'label' children with the words like 'bright', either.

When I was at my son's parent/teacher evening, I asked what he was good at, and what he needed more assistance with, in the teacher's opinion. She said she wasn't allowed to give that opinion. I had to ask 'off the record'.

I came back on here to say that, for some reason, Granny of said child, at Playmill the other day was actually TALKING to the boy who thumped Josh. She did a great job of interacting with him throughout the session and - *surprise, surprise* - he was as good as gold.

circlecross - there is NOTHING you can do except put your point across. If the parent didn't see the action, you won't convince them if they don't want to be convinced. I HATE those parents to take kids and just either ignore them - or worse... watch them and smile indulgently!!! ARGHHH All you could do is stick up for your little one and then (difficult) let it go.

I don't know how different it would be if the damage were bad - bleeding or something...

Milims - how frustrating for you!!! I guess my initial reaction would have been to turn to the parents and say "his drinking is against our house rules - please discipline him" - or something... however, it is a REALLY awkward situation and enforcing it whilst still remaining friends is hard. Perhaps you could write them a letter explaining that although that was unacceptable you don't want to lose them as friends and see how that goes across? Hugz you must feel low about this.

Thanks Tigz - all hugs gratefully accepted!!
I was right that the Mum was unhappy with us - she sent an e-mail saying so and I wrote to her giving our side - but I never got round to sending it. That said she has been in touch about other stuff since so I'm guessing that its something that we will discuss when we next meet up. I do feel that, although its going to be hard, I do need to discuss how unacceptable her sons behaviour is - better coming from someone who cares and who is willing to help and support than from an angry stranger. Having had time to reflect on what happened I realised that there was something that un-nerved me about the situation but couldn't pin point what it was. I spoke to a friend who works with alcoholics and I realised that what it was was that the kid should have at least shown some signs of the effects of the alcohol - but he didn't - which is more worrying. I'm just wondering if this is happening more than she realises and he's getting used to it (its not the first time something like this has happened). I guess we just have to tread carefully and make sure she knows we aren't enemies!
Helen and Chris

Hmmmm food for thought there. Anyway, I hope you work it out and move on. A friend is not worth having that cannot be or take honesty/discussion. I'll be thinking of you.