A Funny

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Annpan
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A Funny

Post: # 150743Post Annpan »

Just got this in an email - it made me laugh, I though I'd pass it on.


One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw
two men along the roadside eating grass.

Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to
investigate.

He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We
have to eat grass."

"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed
you," the lawyer said.

"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over
there, under that tree."

"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.

Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us,
also."

The second man, in a pitiful voice, then said, "But sir, I also
have a wife and SIX children with me!"

"Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.

They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car
as large as the limousine was.

Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and
said, "Sir, you are too kind."

"Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it.

"You'll really love my place.

"The grass is almost a foot high
Ann Pan

"Some days you're the dog,
some days you're the lamp-post"

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JulieSherris
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 150837Post JulieSherris »

:mrgreen: :lol: :mrgreen:

:shock:

:mrgreen: :lol: :mrgreen:
The more people I meet, the more I like my garden :wink:

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Rosendula
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 150839Post Rosendula »

:toothy10:
Rosey xx

Carolinamandolina
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 150925Post Carolinamandolina »

Ha ha ha, this is particularly funny for me cos my girlfriend is a lawyer and I know she'd be really offended by it !

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the.fee.fairy
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 151500Post the.fee.fairy »

Oooh, i got one today too:

Chocolate Calories


A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy two servings per night, and a few more on weekends, I consume 3,500 calories of chocolate in a week, which equals one pound of weight per week.

Therefore...

In the last 3 1/2 years, I have had a chocolate caloric
intake of about 180 pounds. I weigh only 165 pounds, so
without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about three months ago!

I owe my life to chocolate.

And that is the gospel truth. Would I lie to you?

invisiblepiper
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 151518Post invisiblepiper »

Love lawyer jokes! :lol:
Hope the chocolate one is true .....................
Two roads diverged in a wood
And I took the one less travelled by
And that has made all the difference.
(Robert Frost)

Big Al
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 151579Post Big Al »

A man went to a brain store to get some brain to complete a study. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brain offerred at this particular brain store. He begins to question the butcher about the cost of these brains.

"How much does it cost for engineer brain?"

"Three dollars an ounce."

"How much does it cost for programmer brain?"

"Four dollars an ounce."

"How much for lawyer brain?"

"$1,000 an ounce."

"Why is lawyer brain so much more?"

"Do you know how many lawyers we had to kill to get one ounce of brain?"

----------------------------------------- Allegedly........... of course.......
Member of the Ishloss weight group 2013. starting weight 296.00 pounds on 01.01.2013. Now minus 0.20 pounds total THIS WEEK - 0.20 pounds Now over 320 pounds and couldn't give a fig...
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JulieSherris
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 151583Post JulieSherris »

Haha... Andy likes it that engineer/programmers have expensive brains.... he's an engineer that programmes robots for a living, so he now thinks his brains are worth something..... :roll:
The more people I meet, the more I like my garden :wink:

Big Al
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 152007Post Big Al »

JulieSherris wrote:Haha... Andy likes it that engineer/programmers have expensive brains.... he's an engineer that programmes robots for a living, so he now thinks his brains are worth something..... :roll:

see men sticking together....
Member of the Ishloss weight group 2013. starting weight 296.00 pounds on 01.01.2013. Now minus 0.20 pounds total THIS WEEK - 0.20 pounds Now over 320 pounds and couldn't give a fig...
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pumpy
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 152026Post pumpy »

Q; what do you say to a law student who has just graduated?

A; "Big-mac and chips please".
it's either one or the other, or neither of the two.

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Re: A Funny

Post: # 152189Post MuddyWitch »

Fee,

I've printed off your chocholate one & pinned it to the fridge! Hope you don't mind.

MW
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the.fee.fairy
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 152374Post the.fee.fairy »

Not at all - all fridges should have uplifting messages on them!

invisiblepiper
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Re: A Funny

Post: # 152380Post invisiblepiper »

pumpy wrote:Q; what do you say to a law student who has just graduated?

A; "Big-mac and chips please".
:lol: :lol: :lol:
But perhaps a bit too close to the truth!
Loved the engineer one Al - OH also gutting himself! :cheers:
Two roads diverged in a wood
And I took the one less travelled by
And that has made all the difference.
(Robert Frost)

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