Selfsufficientish.com

You're deceptively interesing
You're not as shallow as you appear

If it's a battle of wits you're looking for I should warn you that I'd never fight with an unarmed man.

'Well, I must be going... I'd like to say it's been a pleasure.... but it hasn't so I won't'........

heavens!your the only person i know that can argue with a satnav!

i just love your trousers,where did you get them?i had a pair just like them before i lost weight

Earth's full..... Go home!

~~~~~

The best one I heard being used was at a funeral..... the belligerent ex-wife/widow was very drunk & trying to talk politics with my 'then' boyfriend.....
Her: What are you then, Labour I suppose?
Him: Not really, I'm more of a mysogynist.....
Her: What the f* is one of those?
Him: It means I hate illiterate women.....

She stumbled away, drink in hand.......... I'm still not sure she quite understood......

I've always wanted to use this one...... never could do it though!

Picture the scene.... new 'beau'.... romantic night in.... crucial moment getting naked..... you take a peep..... and utter the comforting words....

'Awww..... How Cute!!!'



I wish I was braver... or more wicked...... !

[quote="JulieSherris"]I've always wanted to use this one...... never could do it though!
Awww..... How Cute!!!'

Well, every one else did,

You're a natural when it come to making people feel clever.

oldfella wrote:

JulieSherris wrote:I've always wanted to use this one...... never could do it though!
Awww..... How Cute!!!'

Well, every one else did,

Brilliant - can't beat that response! Fairly cheered up my Friday!


How about - 'Well he/she has really plumbed his/her shallows for that!'

And here's me thinking you were just a thick, stupid, self oppinionated Tw**

shell wrote:heavens!your the only person i know that can argue with a satnav!

I'll be in your gang then, because I argue with the satnav all the time. And my stupid husband will insist on putting his satnav in my car, so when mine's going and his is going, they argue with each other!

Anyway, my grandad used to say this one to my nan, and she thought I was a lovely thing to say to her dying day. We never disillusioned her, just laughed quietly to ourselves.

"You know Violet? In the half-light, without my glasses, you're beautiful"

Lynne
ps. Try this if you're ever stuck for an insult
http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/

I'm not sure if this is that cunning, but I once said this to a speech therapist who was not really bothering very much with my son.. she said she felt very got at
and I replied

" oh, really, it's nothing personal, I'm having a go at everyone that is failing my son "

My wifes favourite one:
"Whats that useless flap of skin on the end of your penis?"
"Oh,.....it's you!"

pumpy wrote:My wifes favourite one:
"Whats that useless flap of skin on the end of your penis?"
"Oh,.....it's you!"

I'll remember that one....!!!!